“Don’t tell me about your effort. Show me your results.”
― Tim Fargo
Times are changing. People are changing. If there is a comparison done with the movies of the 20th century and that of 21st century it is evident that the pace of change is now adopted by people around the world. In a fast-moving life one doesn’t want to be left over. People say competition is rising I need to gear up for it. What they mean is I don’t want to be left out of the race. This race isn’t going to get easier every passing day. It is going to get tougher and tougher and probably there will be new rules added to it. So, with my present skills I do not feel confident that I will win the race. Well, technically I do not see myself in the race after some time as people would step on my soul and move ahead. Technology is changing every day or probably every hour and those who try to catch up with the speed always have a feeling of running on treadmill. No matter how hard someone tries he stays where he is. The machine is continuously pushing him backward. To reach out to his goal what does he need to do? First of all he needs someone to tell him that he needs to step out of the treadmill which is analogous to changing path or redirecting his skills. That someone is one’s coach or a mentor. Have you noticed that when you pull newspaper very close to your eyes you don’t see anything but a blank piece of paper and as you move it away you tiny letters surface. Move it further and now one could read entire para. Similarly when you are on the field playing the game you can’t think of a strategy that would give you clear victory because your mind is seeing whats coming its way. What could come its way and whats possible can be seen someone who is off the field.
Who is my right coach?
The market is flooded with people who claim to be coaches. Ask them what they could do for you and you would hear tales of success. Ask them what they accomplished in life and then see who takes a long pause.
A coach isn’t born he is created. He is created by his desire to change people’s lives. He is molded by the challenges he faced in life and the storm he withered.
Who would be the right coach for me? To reach out to a coach first and foremost task a person needs to accomplish is to decide what is the objective he wants to achieve. It could be writing his first book or climbing mount Everest or entering in to a big business or a desired health result or a weight loss. Once the goal is clear and by when it needs to be accomplished is decided then the next step is to write down what is it that one already knows that aids in accomplishment of goal. For e.g. if the goal is to scale mount Everest and one knows how to trek he has a skill that will help him in progression. Also write down what skills he may not have which are required in accomplishment of goal. Once this list is ready (it may not be 100% complete however good to start with) then start hunting for a coach.
How to hunt for a coach?
Someone who has already accomplished the goal that you have could be your coach, however it is a myth that this person will be the best coach. They both may have different skills, different state of mind, different strengths and weaknesses. For e.g. a person wants to prove to the world that he can get over his fear of heights and do paragliding and he has a coach who has already done paragliding but who is not afraid of heights, they are trading in different domains. The coach wont be in a position to know how to help that person get over his inherent fear of heights. So although he has the technical skills to coach he may not be effective in producing the desired result. However if he has the technical skills and he also understands what is in it a person he is coaching that will help him get over his fears he could be the right coach for that person. We have seen in history of football how an excellent coach when he is moved from one team to another fails to produce results. What is different? It is the psych of the people who are being coached. So if your goal is to scale mount Everest and you have CV’s of 2 coaches, both have scaled mount Everest before you need to interview both. To help you decide who is your right coach you could ask:
1. I know trekking however I have fear of heights, how do you think I will be able to accomplish my goal of scaling mount Everest?
2. Have you helped someone accomplish his goal when he did not have all the required skills? How?
3. Can you give me name/number of person whom you have coached who has accomplished his goal (gigantic goal)? I would like to hear from him
about his journey.
4. If I fail in the journey how will you help me regain my baton?
These 4 questions are like a googly in a cricket match. Listen to the answers carefully. You have a great system called the judging system installed already in your mind. It will start filtering out people based on responses they give and their body language. Just a word of caution, you may have a biased listening and judging and hence when you start asking please shut off that internal voice with you. Listen to the person and after you completely hear him out make your decision.
People have accomplished phenomenal results something they have never done before with the help of a right coach. Your coach is not going to do the work for you. However he will uncover what is in it you that will help you accomplish your goal, something you will never know and even if you know you would never trust.
He will hold you accountable at every milestone. He will measure your effectiveness in producing results. Wherever you are stuck he will make you think & with this thinking you will take actions to pull yourself out of the situation. Do not ever expect the coach to work for you. He is not your peer, he is your Krishna while you are the Arjuna who has to still fight the battle.
Here’s what Serena Williams, 13 times grand slam champion & Olympic gold medalist had to say about her coach:
“Tony Robbins’ coaching has made a remarkable difference in my life both on and off the court. With Tony’s help, I’ve set new standards for myself, and I’ve taken my tennis game—and my life—to a whole new level!” Serena Williams.
Every person on this planet needs a coach. He needs a coach to scale new horizons.
How do coach appear to some people?
“Pushy, making life miserable, holding to account, making me work, I am tired of his instructions, he has got the best out of me, he is too good, i could do this only because he was there for me, he opened up new possibility of getting the task done, alone I wouldn’t have done it.”
These are expressions of an experience and this experience is worth taking as it will forward you in your goal. So, go for it, go for the RIGHT coach.